Well Equipped

Brandon, my power ranger son, got so excited when I told him I was going to take him ice skating. He's going to be playing organized hockey games this year with his team, the Mini-Mites. It took about almost two hours to buy all of the equipment- helmet, skates, mouth guard, elbow pads, knee pads, the works.

I was pretty surprised at how many different types of each piece of equipment there were from which to choose. I could have bought any one of several mouth guards ranging from $2.00 to $28.00, some of which even came with a policy of dental insurance! I opted for a rubbery one that had to be soaked in boiling water and then molded to my power ranger's bite for fit- a cool $6.25. More of a process was buying the helmet. Brandon wanted the flashy black helmet with lightning bolt logos on it. He didn't like the white one that I got him with all of the legal stickers on it that professed compliance with a blur of mnemonics that made me feel safer about it all.

We took all of the equipment to the ice rink. Brandon donned what he called his full 'costume' and whipped around the rink. After a few lessons, his confidence level had peaked. Unfortunately, he didn't get to the lesson on how to stop. As he attempted to exit the rink, his skates hit the door saddle that separated the ice from the walkway. He began to fall. I never felt so close to him and so far at the same time.

My eyes closed tightly as I winced in anticipation of a big thud. But the thud never sounded, thanks to Lenny. As fate would have it, I had responded to Lenny's house, right around the block from my own, on two separate occasions when he called for an ambulance. On both alarms, I responded directly to his house, which is to say that only seconds passed from the time he had called for help until I arrived. This time, however, it was he who helped me. He caught my son right in his arms, evidently while Brandon was mid-air while my eyes were shut.

Intently, I skated to the scene. Lenny recognized me right away, as I did him. 'Seems we both have a habit of being at the right place at the right time' he said with a sigh of relief. And during the few moments that followed, I realized that his sigh was more one of thankfulness for being able to return a favor his inner self needed to repay to my family for that which he perceived to be my favor to his family and himself. Before that minute, I had never before realized that one of the inate benefits of being an EMS provider not only is the life purpose gained from giving unto others. It also enables others to give back- to their communities, to their own families, and even to individuals. Luckily, I was one of those individuals on that day. And giving back is exactly what Lenny needed to do, at that particular moment. Not only to catch my son. But also to assure himself that there was a reason he needed to keep living. One of the two calls for which I went to Lenny's house involved his son. His son still has not come out of the hospital, which consequently led to Lenny's deep depression, self-mutilation, and ultimately the second ambulance call at his house. 'Enjoy your son' he commanded me at the end of our exchange of pleasantries.

Brandon was more angry than anything about the event. He blamed the whole thing on the fact that his equipment didn't fit right. So he ran a hot bath, and threw his hockey helmet, skates, shin guards, ALL of it.... in to the hot water. "Brandon! What are you doing?!?!" I shouted in disbelief. "But dad, I'm just fitting all this stuff better for myelf just like I saw you fit the mouth guard for me! I don't want to fall anymore!".

Curing the common cold 1 Million at a time

Surprise! Yet another drug product that doesn't do what it is advertised to do.  Last week, the makers of Airborne settled a false advertising lawsuit for $23.3 million.  Before you blame the lawyers and start adding this to your stories in the now infamous McDonald's burn case category, you should know that the Airborne company had projected sales of $300 million for its most recently concluded fiscal year.  

Think about that for a minute... $300 MILLION dollars of sales.  That's a lot of people buying this stuff.  Personally, I find it all fascinating:  the same forces that cured polio and made progress staving off full-blown AIDS have yet to figure out a way to combat the common cold, but wait...  It's a TEACHER who suddenly cracked the code with a mix of vitamin C and zinc.  Lovely. 

Not as brilliant, however, as the marketing plan behind this genius product. Airborne even made "Oprah" and "Live With Regis and Kelly."  Airborne then changed its advertising campaign when a plaintiff filed suit against the company in March, 2006.  ABC news then disclosed a report that the company's clinical trials were not conducted by doctors or scientists, but rather they were carried out by two laypeople. Ya can't make this stuff up.  

But because Airborne is classified as a "supplement" rather than a "drug", it can be sold without first being proven effective.  Have fun shopping at GNC everyone. Let me know how that works out for ya. 

Post Script:  Tamiflu- a Roche prescription drug that has been proven effective at treating the flu, will carry a new warning.  The new warning notes that there have been problems related to this drug that have proven FATAL.  

Here's my advice:   don't get sick. 

Does EMS Need To Call 911?

Men's health had this article published recently. The comments to the article that I have read so far are dead on.   Click the link and take a gander. 

CC Rider

I just finished a three-night ACLS course given through Nassau County VEEB, and I loved every minute of it. I have been to many classes, given by many different instructors.  Truly, this was one of the best instructed courses I have ever attended.  The student/teacher ratio was about 4 to 1 at all times except during lecture and movie presentation.  The instructors were very knowledgeable; and made themselves available both before and after class to answer any questions.  Equally impressive to me was the fact that the instructors somehow created a chemistry in the class wherein every student helped one another. Notwithstanding, the students were all EMT-CC or higher, except for me and one other very nice girl.  What an amazingly refreshing experience all around.  I passed my practicals and writtens first time around too.  Go me. In any event, its a good feeling to be part of a group so committed to what they do on so many different levels. Just like most attorneys (YEAH RIGHT!).  Can't wait to start my EMT-CC course in september. T minus 5 months or so. Get your bodies ready everyone. 

No Guts, No Glory

The norovirus and I know each other very well now, since it introduced itself to me last Sunday.  There I was- writhing in pain on my own bedroom floor from the stomach cramps. No, wait... I was sitting with my face buried in the trash can.... no wait... the sink... no wait.... the bath tub... no wait... the garbage bag...no wait... just vomiting everywhere, and in a 25 foot radius, like a rotating, vomiting sprinkler head. 

 I couldn't speak.  I couldn't control my bodily functions. My princess cried, while my power ranger tried to calm her.  Told my wife to call my brother and sister EMTs to take me to the hospital. Quick response. Had every EMT from my department, and about 20 firefighters in my house.  My kids watched.  My wife told everyone I was exaggerating.  And the norovirus and I snuggled together in the gurney.  How embarrassing. How humiliating. I was able to mutter that I wanted my own company within the department to transport. Caught hell for that the next day. Apparently, that request insulted everyone who wasn't in my company.... gimme a break and HTFU!!!  There wasn't much left inside of me. I was spilling my guts out, but I'm not talking about the obvious.  I'm talking about my dignity. I had nothing left of me by the time I reached the hospital.  

I didn't much like being on the bus looking up at my company's EMTs.  I much more prefer being an EMT looking down at my patient.  

My princess and my power ranger, well, they love coming to my 'house', running around the apparatus floor wearing one of my tar-ridden fireproof turnout gear gloves, shining my flashlight, and even sleigh riding in my helmet when it snows enough.  They love taking out a steth and listening to me whisper sweet nothings, and wrapping the BP cuff around each other's heads.  But lately, they don't like firefighters and medics.  They pan their faces when my pager goes off now, for they know there is someone calling for me and the other EMTs- someone with no guts- or worse, someone with a princess or power ranger of their own, watching it all, helplessly, and now memory-scarred.  

My power ranger still says he wants to be a firefighter.  My little girl still wants to be a 'princess doctor'.  They both know now that walking each of those paths requires more than just fighting fires, or treating sick princesses.  This all taught to them by my friend the norovirus.  With friends like that, who needs enemies.  It's all chillingly ironic. 

Hey, All You Starbucks Freaks... HTFU!

This video is dedicated to all the wonderful employees of my law office, and those at the courthouse who had to stay home because they were 'buried' under the one inch coating of snow we got the other day, or they 'had' to leave early due to the 'severe' weather conditions. HTFU!!! Major props to MDOD for the find....

Moving Ahead

 Advanced spiritual people such as Buddha, Christ and their immediate students seem to be always painted with golden haloes around their heads.  I don't know if it's because some artists can actually see Auras, or whether they want others to think they do. But it appears as far back as time itself.  In Australia's remote West Kimberleys you can even find prehistoric cave paintings, many thousands of years old, depicting people with golden haloes.  (By the way, I did spend last weekend visiting museums in New York City with my family and some friends- just in case you're wondering what the genesis of that factoid is.)

As most of you know, there isn't a night that goes by that I don't tuck my kids into bed and put them to sleep.  My princess is 3, and my power ranger is 4.   It's somewhat of a challenge every night when I lay in my son's bed with the lights out.  He usually asks me to tell him a bedtime story, and I always start it off with "Once upon a time, far, far away..."  But tonight, I decided to tell him about his own past.  I told him how 'when he was a baby', I lulled him at night to my best rendition of Harry Chapin's "Cats In The Cradle".  He and I used to call it the "Bum Bum" song- much easier for him to have pronounced.  "Can you sing it to me tonight daddy?"  And as I did, and his eyelids slowly shut, I could swear I saw cartoon-like figurines coming out of his 

precious little sleepy head- giraffes, fluffy rabbits, puppy dogs, baby elephants, ponies and lollipops.  

Harry Chapin died in a freak car accident right here in Jericho, New York on the Long Island Expressway in 1981.  Frank B., an old timer firefighter in my department told me that he was one of many who responded to the accident back then.  "I picked up his head from the backseat," he said very matter of factly, looking hard into my eyes with a straight face.  I wonder what Harry's aura was like. All Frank B. said he saw was "a lot of blood". 

 

Gotta go and find a mirror now.  See if I have one of these aura things around my head.   I think it has something to do with my hair loss. There's gotta be someone I can sue. 

The Blue Light Special

A firefighter, responding in his personal vehicle, is seriously injured when he swerves to avoid a truck at an intersection and skids into a city bus...

A volunteer EMS responder is killed in a car crash on his way to the Fire Station for a cardiac call...

Perhaps you've read about such accidents in an emergency services publication. On the other hand, maybe one of them hit closer to home, and the story made your local newspaper. Either way, the news isn't good. According to the NFPA, fire department emergency vehicles were involved in an estimated 14,900 collisions in 2001 while responding to, or returning from, incidents. Firefighters' personal vehicles were involved in 1,325 collisions. Together, they resulted in 1,100 firefighter injuries.


24 firefighters - 17 of whom died in crashes - were killed in 2001 while responding to or returning from alarms: the second most common activity resulting in firefighter fatalities.According to U.S. Fire Administration statistics, nearly 20–25% of accidental deaths in the fire service are related to vehicles, and many, if not most, of these accidents involve intersections. A study published in the Annals of Emergency Medicine (December 2002), “Occupational Fatalities in Emergency Medical Services: A Hidden Crisis,” states the leading cause of occupational fatalities for EMS personnel during the study period (1992–1997) was transportation incidents (86/114 fatalities).

Section 375, subsection 41, sub-subsection 4 of the New York State Vehicle and Traffic Law reads as such:

4. Blue light. a. One blue light may be affixed to any motor vehicle
owned by a volunteer member of a fire department or on a motor vehicle
owned by a member of such person's family residing in the same household
or by a business enterprise in which such person has a proprietary
interest or by which he or she is employed....

That's right.  The good people in Albany, New York say that ONE blue light is allowed.  Not two, not blue and white, just ONE, BLUE light.  The law hasn't changed in more than 20 years.  Makes me feel like a kid again:

"Oh, please Mr. Lawmaker, gimme just one more light? Pretty please?!"

Well.... I hope you all join me in thanking our thoughtful lawmakers in Albany, and others like them for looking out for guys and gals like me, who may not make it to the next call because of the one light limitation.  Thanks for caring. Really. My wife and kids thank you too.  

And as for my brothers and sisters, lets be careful out there. I, for one, care about you. 

OK. Gotta go put my kids to sleep now. It's light's out time. Night night. 

Stoned

When I was a young lad, I used to think Sharon Stone was hot. I'm all grown up now. She's not hot anymore. She's ugly with a capital F. And she should learn to keep her mouth shut if she has things to say like her most recent defamation of my country.   

Sharon....leave.....now. 

This is my brain on drugs

Props and credit goes to Emergency Emily for this one.... It's what's inside that counts, right?

It's been like spinning plates for me this week.

This pretty much captures what my life has been like this week.

"Trust Me"

A client came into my law firm yesterday. He was scared. Genuinely scared. And he was a firefighter/EMT. He sat in the chair across from me in my office, and the first thing he said to me was, "I'm here because I trust you." He suspected he was going to be sued for discrimination. Even if he prevailed on such a case, he still would be scarred and marked for life. Think "The Rocket" Roger Clemens walking around with a halligan and a trauma bag. As I listened to his story, I felt it was more important to look into his eyes as he spoke rather than taking notes as I usually do. "I don't know what to do, Rich. Is this the end for me and my family?". I told him in no uncertain terms that there was no danger and that he did nothing wrong. He was thankful- both to God and to me. "I know I can believe you, Rich. Thanks." We finished up, and he gave me a Svengali-like bear hug. Royce Gracie, eat your heart out. He left my office a new man, ready to fight fires and rescue the injured.

I responded to a car accident that night. Three cars, and a lot of damage. A young girl, who was anunrestrained backseat passenger was walking around at the scene. No outside signs of DCAP-BTLS, but my suspicions ran high for internal bleeding. She must have called her parents before my bus arrived on scene, becase they came to the accident site. "Why aren't you taking her to the same hospital as the others? It's closer." Not much time to sit with them in consultation to explain the difference between a trauma center and the other hospital. I told them that I have two children of my own, and I would do the same thing for my kids as I would their daughter. "OK. We trust you are doing the right thing."

My kids are both sick today. They sound like seals when they cough, and elephants when they blow their noses. My house is, literally, a zoo. They take the medicine I give them so readily. I tell them that they will be better soon. "When, daddy?" "very very soon." They smile at me, and then they go downstairs to play.

I went to the gas station to fill my tank up before I hit up Dunkin' Donuts for some coffee and a bagel. I had to pay the attendant before he would turn the pump on. Guess he didn't trust me.

Face Mold

Ok.... someone just found my blog site using the search term "lady face mold". Houston, we have a problem.

Bourne Mexican

Wonder if the character would work with other nationalities too.

Breath Sounds

It gets all too overwhelming for me sometimes. Rarely, but sometimes. And that's too often. One thought turns into two, then five, then five million. When it snowballs like that, I can't catch my breath. So usually I take a long drag from a Marlboro Light. Go figure.



It was noisier at first in the Trial Assignment Part courtroom today. An annoying cacophony. Kinda like a bunch of lawyers all saying the words "peas and squash, peas and squash" to one another, really not talking about anything at all. Then Judge Sweeney took the bench, the bailiff called for order, and it got real quiet, real fast. I swear, someone farted. It was gross. No one flinched. No one moved. No one made a face. All for fear of being removed from the courtroom and missing the calendar call. All anyone could do was breathe in the stale, thick air. Amidst the quiet, the EMT in me couldn't help but take such opportunity to fine tune my caregiver skills, so I listened to the bodies around me for crackles, rales, and I think i even detected a heart murmur, all without a stethoscope, without getting out of my chair, and without flinching from the old smelly lawyer man ass gas. Did I mention my ear is bionic? Lindsay Wagner, eat your heart out.





I got home relatively early. I promptly changed my clothes. That's when the pager went off. Signal 9. Female with chest pains over at the cablevision offices. I started to breathe heavier. I always do that though when I get a Signal 9 across the pager. It's exciting. A good exciting. So, no Marlboro Light. Go figure. We found the lady just hanging out in her boss' office. She's had this pain since the morning, or so she says. She was fine really. No shortness of breath.  But we packed her up in the bus and took her to the hospital. There were two other EMTs riding with me. One started to give the lady some aspirin. He was relatively new, so, we had this 5 second debate as to whether our protocol allowed us to administer the aspirin without asking Med Comm. I backed down, and listened to the lady's breath sounds instead. Her lungs sounded just like the breath sounds of the smelly lawyer man from this morning. So I put some blankets over her in case she farted.

My wife and daughter were home when I got back from the call. We started watching Americas Funniest Videos in bed. My wife took a phone call and went downstairs. I shut the lights off, and cooed my little princess to sleep. She rested her beautiful head on my chest. I think she was listening to my lungs.

Wall Street

Wall Street is one of my favorite movies of all time.  The sequel is due out soon.  I'm pumped for it. 

Here is a great clip, introducing Gordon Gekko to the world. If you listen carefully, you will hear Gekko's receptionist tell him his wife is on the phone. He doesn't flinch!!

 Here are some memorable quotes from the original:

"The richest one percent of this country owns half our country's wealth, five trillion dollars. One third of that comes from hard work, two thirds comes from inheritance, interest on interest accumulating to widows and idiot sons and what I do, stock and real estate speculation. It's bullshit. You got ninety percent of the American public out there with little or no net worth. I create nothing. I own. We make the rules, pal. The news, war, peace, famine, upheaval, the price per paper clip. We pick that rabbit out of the hat while everybody sits out there wondering how the hell we did it. Now you're not naive enough to think we're living in a democracy, are you buddy? It's the free market. And you're a part of it. "

"The main thing about money, Bud, is that it makes you do things you don't want to do."

Gordon Gekko: [at the Teldar Paper stockholder's meeting] Well, I appreciate the opportunity you're giving me Mr. Cromwell as the single largest shareholder in Teldar Paper, to speak. Well, 

ladies and gentlemen we're not here to indulge in fantasy but in political and economic reality. America, America has become a second-rate power. Its trade deficit and its fiscal deficit are at 

nightmare proportions. Now, in the days of the free market when our country was a top industrial po

wer, there was accountability to the stockholder. The Carnegies, the Mellons, the men that built this great industrial empire, made sure of it because it was their money at stake. Today, management has no stake in the company! All together, these men sitting up here own less than three percent of the company. And where does Mr. Cromwell put his million-dollar salary? Not in Teldar stock; he owns less than one percent. You own the company. That's right, you, the stockholder. And you are all being royally screwed over by these, these bureaucrats, with their luncheons, their hunting and fishing trips, their corporate jets and golden parachutes.

Cromwell: This is an outrage! You're out of line Gekko!

Gordon Gekko: Teldar Paper, Mr. Cromwell, Teldar Paper has 33 different vice presidents each earning over 200 thousand dollars a year. Now, I have spent the last two months analyzing what all these guys do, and I still can't figure it out. One thing I do know is that our paper company lost 110 million dollars last year, and I'll bet that half of that was spent in all the paperwork going back and forth between all these vice presidents. The new law of evolution in corporate America seems to be survival of the unfittest. Well, in my book you either do it right or you get eliminated. In the last seven deals that I've been involved with, there were 2.5 million stockholders who have made a pretax profit of 12 billion dollars. Thank you. I am not a destroyer of companies. I am a liberator of them! The point is, ladies and gentleman, that greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right, greed works. Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit. Greed, in all of its forms; greed for life, for money, for love, knowledge has marked the upward surge of mankind. And greed, you mark my words, will not only save Teldar Paper, but that other malfunctioning corporation called the USA. Thank you very much.

I don't go to bed with no whore, and I don't wake up with no whore. That's how I live with myself. I don't know how you do it.

Blue Horse Shoe Loves Anacot Steel.

You stop sending me information, and you start getting me some.

Carl Fox: He's using you, kid. He's got your prick in his back pocket, but you're too blind to see it.
Bud Fox: No. What I see is a jealous old machinist who can't stand the fact that his son has become more successful than he has!
Carl Fox: What you see is a guy who never measured a man's success by the size of his WALLET!
Bud Fox: That's because you never had the GUTS to go out into the world and stake your own claim!
[Long Pause]Carl Fox: Boy, if that's the way you feel, I must have done a really lousy job as a father.

Carl Fox: "I came into Egypt a Pharoah who did not know."
Gordon Gekko: I beg your pardon, is that a proverb.
Carl Fox: No, a prophecy. The rich been doing it to the poor since the beginning of time. The only difference between the Pyramids and the Empire State Building is the Egyptians didn't allow unions. I know what this guy is all about, greed. He don't give a damn about Bluestar or the unions. He's in and out for the buck and he don't take prisoners.

"It's yourself you have to be proud of, Huckleberry".

Remember When.....

Here's an excerpt from one of my wife's recent phone conversations....

Wife's friend:  "Remember when you were a kid and you had lice?"

Wife:  "Um, no. I never had lice when I was a kid."

Having a hard time figuring out what you are looking for when you think your kids have lice? This picture of the 3 stages of the head lice life cycle can help:

m'K.  I'm getting itchy.  And im officially skeeved out. I think I'll stop now.   

Little things mean a lot

My dad was on a business trip in Boston. My mom was working late. I was 10 years old, and I had just moved to Pleasantville, New York the month prior. There were no cell phones back then, so, I watched TV along side my dog, Ralph, until my mom got home. The digital clock read 900PM. I was turning away from the TV show quite frequently to look at it. And then the doorbell rang. There was a man who I had never met before standing in the doorway with Craig Bilotti, a kid from my 5th grade class. The man was from the Pleasantville Volunteer Ambulance Corps. It was his job to explain to me that my mom had been in a horrible car accident, and she wasnt expected to live through the night. Pain. Severe pain. The kind that doesn't go away. The type that is incomparable to what my mom went through, and the likes of which I don't talk about, for fear of doing just that- comparing it to, and thereby belittling, my mother's pain- her physical pain that is. But that man... he made a difference. He was an EMT. But I am SURE that no EMS instructor taught him about how well he handled himself, and me, that night.

As soon as things settled down, my dad joined the Pleasantville Ambulance Corps and became an EMT himself. I'm not sure exactly why he did. Certainly, though, he did it either to pay back a debt, or to help others, or to incorporate within himself the values of the man in my doorway that night, or perhaps all of these reasons. I dont' really think it's important to know which anyway. It's also not the crux of this blog entry to know whether my mom survived, which she did. I have always maintained, nonetheless, that my parents, neither of whom graduated college, are the two of the most intelligent people who walk the earth.

I think somehow they passed that quality on to my children. My son loves hockey, and we all went to a New York Islanders hockey game last night. Here is a dialogue excerpt from my son, 4 (my power ranger), and my daughter, 3 (my princess) as we left after the game:

Me to my son: So do you still want to be a hockey player when you grow up?
Son to me: Yeah. And a lawyer and a firefighter and a paramedic too.
My daughter to all: I wanna be a doctor for princesses and the princesses will save all the world.
Son to daughter: You can't save everyone in the world.
Daughter to Son: Yes you can.
Son: No you can't. Only daddy can. He's a paramedic and a firefighter. (ed.: funny how he left out lawyer!)
(shouting match ensues between them)
(then, finally.....)

Daughter to Me: Daddy, can you save everyone?
Me: No, sweetheart, I can't. But that doesn't stop me from trying. I just try it one person at a time.
Son: Yeah. I'm gonna do that too.
Daughter: Yeah. Me too.

And so, to those who are amongst us, coming to our aid ever so subtly, without flashing lights and sirens, without trauma bags and neck collars, I salute you.

Tell Me Why Long Island

Here are some facts about Long Island, where I call home:

Long Island is 118 miles long and 18-20 miles wide at its widest point. 

Population (all four counties: Suffolk, Nassau, Queens, Kings) 7,448,618.  Thats 5,470 people per square mile!!!

The population for just Nassau and Suffolk Counties (the two counties that are actually considered Long Island, because Kings a/k/a Brooklyn and Queens are actually part of New York City): 2.7 million.  

Long Island is more populated than 97 countries of the world!!

Long Island is the most populated island in any US state or territory.  It is also the 17th most populous island in the world, ahead of Ireland, Jamaica and the Japanese island of Hokkaido.  

Nassau County is ranked fifth highest in income per capita in the entire country.  

Nassau County, according to the 2000 Census, is the third richest county per capita in New York State, and the thirtieth richest in the nation.  If it were an independent nation, it would rank as the 96th most populated nation, falling between Switzerland and Israel.  

Median Long Island Home Price:  In Excess of $400,000

In 2001, the Washington-based Economic Policy Institute reported that Long Island had the highest cost of living/income index in the country.  

The average property tax bill for an average size home is between $8,000 and $16,000 a year... that's just the property tax, folks... no mortgage is included in those numbers.  In fact, Nassau County has the second highest property taxes in the United States.  

The average electric bill for a standard 4 bedroom, 2 bath home is over $300 per month, without air conditioning or holiday lights. 

If you combined all the fire and rescue vehicles, Long Island has more than New York City gand Los Angeles COMBINED!

According to Forbes Magazine, the most expensive home in North America is Three Ponds Estate in Bridgehampton, valued at $75 million.

The Nassau County jail has been probed by the Federal government for prisoner abuses, including death.  

So why am I staying?  Highest cost of living, second hightest property tax, and traffic... oh, did I forget to mention the traffic?  5,470 people per square mile all getting to and from work, I suppose, to pay for all of this.  

In September 1998, a small tornado hit Lynbrook, Long Island; in August 1999, an F-2 tornado hit Mattituck, Long Island; in August 2005, a tornado hit Glen Cove, Long Island; one year later in August, 2006, a tornado hit Massapequa in Nassau County; and on July 18, 2007, a tornado hit Islip Terrace.  

Long Island:  the only place you have to be rich to be poor.  

Sometimes, though, its easier to deal with the devil you know than the one you don't.  Oh, matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match! Find me a town, where i can be a paramedic, where i can give my children more opportunities in life than I ever had myself, where i can life in relative security, where medical care is top notch and cutting-edge.  Find me a place where I can discern the difference between what I am here to do and what I would like to do while I am here.  Can any of you tell me why I'm doing this all on Long Island?  Hope you can help me figure it out.  In the meantime, I will be trying to save some lives.  The more people are alive the more chance I have to come up with answers.  

There is this lady I know.  You probably know her too.  She is the kind of person you just want to smack the crap out of. She doesn't really work.  She just spends a lot of money all day, everyday, mostly on herself, and mostly on getting her nails done.  She doesn't really earn any money herself though.   In any given month, she spends more than her account is worth anyway, thanks to her hard working husband.  

As many of you know, I am fluent in Spanish.  This lady calls me quite often so that I can tell her hispanic nanny the things she wants done by the time she gets back from the spa.  And this spanish lesson is dedicated to her.  Hey, lady... your nails look great.  Really.